Portugal in Europa Universalis, part 2

Time to set out. I loaded one fleet and sailed them west to the New World. Ahem, I said I loaded troops onto a fleet and…what a bunch of laggards. Are they lazy, cowardly or both? I’d forgotten that loading troops on ships in Europa Universalis is a ‘process.’ You can’t actually click on the ship to load them. You can’t load them in port either. You have to move the ship into an unoccupied sea zone, then move the army not onto the ships but into the sea zone. Fifteenth century armies liked to swim, I guess.

My fleet had sailed without an army so I loaded the nose-pickers onto the second fleet and sailed down towards West Africa. The first fleet discovered Manhattan, Delaware and part of Cuba, but they were severely battered by weather and being so far from a friendly port. At least that’s their story. I think they mutinied so they could vacation in the Caribbean.

The Africa-bound fleet parked off the Ivory Coast and deposited troops right on top of unsuspecting natives. The proximity to Portugal was nice. I sent the ships back to pick up some mercenaries and return to bolster the existing army.

After establishing colonies on the Canary Islands and along the Ivory Coast, my lilly-livered layabouts spotted Mali to the north, an African kingdom in distress. “My liege, they seem to be cavitating under the pressure of internal revolt,” General Poltroon reported. “Might this be a good time to, say, puff out our chest and lay claim to their tracts of land?” I considered his proposal. Our heretofore most significant military victory had been against some plucky native villagers who charged our ranks with fishing nets and attractive pottery. Mali was a kingdom owning more provinces than the pink-bellied monarchy of Portugal. “Let’s pile on Pete,” I said, crossing my fingers tightly. It became our new battlecry.

Continue to part 3.