The 2006 MA Awards, part 2
The Most Likelys
by Brad at Blogg'dEvery year thousands of high school year book editors across America have the difficult task of picking out classmates for the prestigious "most likely" awards. In keeping with this fine tradition I have decided to compile my own "most likely" list for all the misfits at Maximum Awesome.
Most likely to get caught banging a moose in the Yukon: The Corporal. Let's face it, it gets lonely out there chasing Snidely Whiplash types in the Canadian wilderness. Who could blame a man if he were to consider taking certain liberties with a friendly female moose? Besides, The Corporal is just twisted enough to go through with it. They're not called "Mounties" for nothing you know.
Most likely to die on the toilet crapping his brains out: Dave McAwesome. Olestra...Taco Bell...McDonald's Monopoly binges...need I say more?
Most likely to be hanging the head of the moose that was banged by the Corporal in his living room: Adam Brown. Adam's recent pick of Canada for one of the Seven Wonders of the World can only be explained by one of two things: too many viewings of the South Park movie (thus the lame Bryan Adams joke) or a genuine love for moose head décor. If you consider that South Park is much too sophisticated for Adam, it can only be the latter.
Most likely to screw a tall dark stranger in a cemetery: Webkittyn. Never ever include your bizarre sexual fantasies in your 100 things list; they belong in a letter to Dan Savage.
Most likely to get caught hanging out at the cemetery so she can film Webkittyn screwing a tall dark stranger: Malfouka. After you read a few of her posts you won't be surprised to learn that "Malfouka" is Swahili for pervert.
Most likely to get caught dressed up in a moose costume while hanging out in the Yukon: Deb. Is it any coincidence that both Deb and the Corporal disappear from the forum right in the midst of the moose mating season?
Part 3 continues here
