Hirsute Heaven

by Frank Pittarese

Dear Frank,
Ever since I was a kid and rummaged through my mother's Cosmopolitan with that crazy centerfold of a nude Burt Reynolds, or found myself trying to touch Gil Gerard through the TV set while watching Buck Rogers in the 25th Century, I've had a thing for hairy chests on guys. Love them love them love them. I love the way they feel, I love being curled up in them, Iove lickin' 'em--and I love how masculine they make men appear to me.

Here's the thing--as a 31-year-old searching for love and lots of casual screwing, I'm finding that it's really difficult to be sexually attracted to men without that patch of fur on their chests. In my requirements for long-term love, "funny, smart, financially stable, handsome, and hairy chested" make the head of the list--and not necessarily in that order. I could definitely subsidize a guy with a gorgeous hairy chest...and be quite happy about it (well, at least for a little while).

So here's my question--is this some sort of fetish? Do I need some therapy? Do I just live with it and ask guys to unbutton their shirts before I take them home with me?

I've had awfully good luck (at least in the short-term) in both the love/sex department when it comes to furry guys, but I'm curious if I'm stuck on a dark and dangerous road--and if I need to widen my horizons or just embrace this particular fetish and run with it.
--Love 'em like Gil in NYC

Quite Frankly: Look, Gil-lover, everybody has their thing. Some guys are obsessed with body builders. Others will only go out with guys with tattoos. Or big dicks. Or piercings. Or pierced dicks. Whatever, man. If hairy chests are what turn you on, I say you shouldn't set up camp until you find a man with a forest on his pecs.

Is it a problem? I don't think so, not unless you're hurting people by laughing at their puny little boy-chests before kicking them shirtless out the door. I think everybody should have a certain amount of pleasure in life...a particular thing that they won't negotiate or settle for. This is yours. Lick away!